HW 1 : Psychological Effects on Children

Single parent families are struggling from different problems both the parent and the children which may not exist in two parent families. There is this situation that the parent and the children are not of the same sex, which tend them not to overcome pyschological effects of single parenthood easily. For example, if the father is present and the child is a girl, the father cannot attend to the needs of the daughter especially if she is in the stage of being a teenager because the father do not know enough about what a girl experiences during that period. Pieces of advices may be given to the daughter but it is more appropriate and comfortable if the one who gives advices is the mother. This also goes to the situation that the mother is present and the child is a boy. This is more difficult to deal with because girls are naturally more understanding than boys. The mother might be having a hard time talking to her child because the absence of a father to a boy is quite a big deal for them unless they are trying to accept things like those from the very beginning.

This just simply shows that sometimes it is better and easier if the responsibilities and obligations are shared between both parents.

Thinking about this matter made me curious, so I looked for some psychological effects of single parenthood. Along searching on the Internet, I came across with this article entitled Psychological Effects of a Single-Parent Family which gave an answer to my curiosity.

Below are the psychological effects a child might be experiencing in a single parent family stated in the article.

1. Loneliness.

Loneliness and isolation occur because of the loss of the partnership between the mother and father within the family. When a person experiences separation or divorce, it tends to cause that person to feel alone and unhappy. Sharing joys and sorrows with someone else on a regular basis does not occur, and the support within the partnership regarding parenting does not exist. This loneliness and isolation that the parent experiences can affect the children, no matter their age, because they will witness the sadness of the parent.

2. Role Models

While girls may have better role models with single moms and boys with single dads, both will see a different view of the world than if they had both parents living together. For example, a girl only will see her mother operating as a single person, not as part of a synergistic couple. She may see her mother date, but that does not take the place of the child seeing her mother interact with a life-partner. Boys who live with their fathers face the same psychological problem of discovering how to behave with the opposite sex.

3. Feeling Different

If all of a child's friends live in two-parent households, the child may feel left out and different from his friends. He may feel he misses something in everyday life that he may not exactly understand. Even if the child's friends live in single-parent homes, their experiences will feel somewhat different because of which parent takes care of his friends and each parent's different parenting style.

4. Child-Rearing Differences

Both parents can have disagreements about rearing the children. They may constantly battle over power and compete for the position of better parent. Counterproductively, in-laws and friends may get involved, trying to help, but ultimately causing distress for the parents and children. This psychological and negative component of single parenting may cause the child to have psychological issues later, involving trust.

These are the common psychological effects on children, but this kind of issues can be prevented by a single parent.

There is an article that I read entitled Psychological Effects of Having a Single-Parent about how a single parent can protect their children form these kind of psychological risk factors.

1. Talk and listen to children. Explain any changes that are taking place within your family.

2. Shield kids from parental conflict. Don't ask them to take sides. Try to find a way to work with your ex-spouse.

3. Pay attention to your own feelings.You may be burdened with guilt and self-loathing because your marriage or relationship failed. These attitudes can be contagious. If necessary, see a counselor to work through issues.

4. Accentuate the positive. Children in a single-parent home often take on more responsibility, which can teach them independence. Be sure to recognize their contributions and be generous with praise.

A single parent might be having a hard time in coping and doing efforts on how they can make their children accept things on these kind of issues arising to your family, but children are much more affected by these problems because as a child, they are curious and may questions are coming up to their minds. So a single parent might as well do some strategies on how to cope about problems about psycological on children.